Game Over

Grasshoppers have the incredible ability to fly in swarms of thousands separated by mere micrometers without ever colliding.  This ability is so evolved that companies are studying grasshoppers in an effort to develop the next generation driverless car.  Humans do not posses this talent.  We walk around bumping into things all day, especially in the freewheeling flurry of the morning commute. 

It begins the moment you step off the train onto a platform filled with the inevitable rush of commuters.  People compressed shoulder to shoulder all pushing towards the same one and a half person wide staircase.  There are no rules, it’s every man, woman, and child for themselves.

In the midst of the turmoil I watch as a starry-eyed greenhorn politely waves an elderly lady past, “after you ma’am.”  Noble but misguided for he knew not what he did.  Commuter after commuter hurriedly pushed by as the surprised young man was backed out of the line entirely, his spirit shattered.  Two weeks later I saw the same, now embittered, commuter deliberately trip a small child to use him as a sticky little barricade.

After dodging countless elbows, I finally reached the top of the stairs and with just a short walk through the station made it out into the brisk city morning.  Commuter after commuter poured onto the sidewalk beside me. I make a sharp left out of the door.  After months of experimenting I have systematically determined the route with the least foot traffic and widest sidewalks. 

I cross the street just after the light changes but in my peripheral vision I see a man walking perpendicular who saw fit to run the light.  Like a real-life game of Frogger he made his way in between the moving cars.  Remarkably, amidst an onslaught of honks from the angry drivers, he managed to reach the sidewalk.  Level 1 complete.

By this time everyone who had crossed the sidewalk alongside me had reached the opposite corner.  It was still a fairly dense crowd and I saw that that the foolish Frogger was about to walk right into someone, some misguided thought in his brain commanding him not to falter in his stride.  Seconds later Frogger was on the ground.   

He had tried to cut in front of an exceptionally portly pedestrian but they locked legs and both men tripped.  The larger man landed on top effectively squashing poor little frogger.  Welcome to Level 2 of the wonderfully mind-numbing monotony that is the daily commute.